Mr. Bollywood

So three days ago the hotel clerk asked me if I want to be in a Bollywood movie and of course I agreed, maybe i would be discovered, right?
The next morning I was up bright and early and climbed aboard a rickety old bus with about 50 other travellers of all ages and descriptions and we trundeled through the streets of Mumbai for about an hour till we reached what was the newest and cleanest building I have seen in the city. (Most of the city looks as if it hasnt been cleaned or painted in at least 50 years, even the brand new buildings look run down).
We were herded off the bus and taken up some stairs and stuck in a large room where nothing happened for the next couple of hours - it wasnt too bad, we chatted, swapped stories and of course compared prices - very amusing and informative.
Then a wardrobe mistress appeared (easily the hardest working person of the entire adventure) and handed out medical staff type uniforms to about half the people. Then a couple more hours of hanging around. I never found out why they were dressed as medics and none of them knew either. I'm not even sure they were used for a shot. By that time it was about 1 oclock and we were all marched of to the commisary (canteen) for quite a decent Indian lunch (Yes! I do eat some Indian food!) I kept hoping the cast of Blazing Saddles would come roaring through but that didnt happen.
We sat around for a couple more ours and then my big chance came! While some of the girls were dressed in what the Indian audience imagine western women wear with hair done in a way they imagine western women do there hair (there was some resemlance but I dont believe any of the girls would be caught dead looking like that!) the guys were dressed in "standard" western clothes. I was given slacks that were too short and a shirt that was too short and they couldnt find shoes to fit me - naturally when filming started I was pushed to the back. My big moment in cinema lasted about 2 seconds as part of the crowd in a museum. I was not singled out, I was not discovered, I was not given a big fat 5 year contract in Bollywood! I was not even in the really big scene with an actual Indian film star with fireworks and baloons and champagne. Oh the frustration.
We had to hang around till 12 that night, fortunately at about 7:30 they handed out beers which calmed most of the people down (if you remeber I dont drink beer) but by 12:00 we had all had enough and some of the kids started a mini riot and strike so the bus was brought around again and as we climbed aboard we were each handed 5 crisp new 100 ruphee notes, fair pay for a fair days work. I dont believe I'll make a career of it, I dont think it would give me a living.
But it was without a doubt my best day in Mumbai, far from the maddening crowd, in a pleasant parklike area with shade and grass and benches and of course very few people. We could sit in the shade, doze, chat, read and relax. And even if I did not achieve stardom it was a fun experience.
But I dont think I'll do it again in this lifetime.